Taco Hell
by Maya Beebop
Summary: Senor Diablo likes to play with mortals who aren't yet within his grasp.  But can Nny be swayed by an illusion?  Fast-food beauties, lap-slushies, and the Devil in this one-shot ficlet.


Johnny approached the counter to order a taco. He placed his order to a smiling waitress and received his change. She gave him his tray.

"Thank you, sir, and please remember the Taco Smell's strict policy, 'We Aim To Please, Keep Our Restaurant Clean, and Observe All Kindnesses Towards Other Food-Goers'!" she quoted.

He nodded and walked to a booth. Chewing, he didn't notice a group of teenage boys saunter up to him and began nit picking.

"Dude, where the hell did you get those boots?"

"Yeah, and where're your non-designer-brand shirts? You're so cheap!"

"Dude, I bet he shops at J-Mart! Ha!"

"J-Mart, J-Mart!" they began chanting.

One grabbed his drink and spilled it in Johnny's lap. "Oops, dude. Sorry. Looks like you wet your pants! Ha ha ha!!!" he laughed.

Johnny tensed up and began to rise, but heard a voice from his side.

"I can't seem to stress the strictness of our 'Kindness to People' POLICY!!!"

On the final word, Johnny's waitress seemed to have appeared and had punched the hell out of the guy who had spilled his drink. She turned around and kicked two more guys in the stomach, taking on a martial arts form. Three more felt their manliness was challenged, so they came forward, fists balled. They didn't last long. Records state that they were peeing in a bag for the next two weeks.

She stood straight up and pushed her hair back. A few stray wisps had fallen out of her ponytail, and she shoved them behind her ears.

"Whew! Some people just don't respect other human beings. Don't you agree?" She grinned at the stunned Johnny.

"Yeah. I get that all the time."

She smiled. "Well, if you'll excuse me, I've got some people's orders to take!" she giggled. She walked back to the counter and ensued in giving people tacos and soft drinks.

Johnny heard a voice in his head.

__

Yesss, Johnny. You feel something for this girl. Does she pleassseeee you? Does she make you want to have feelingsss again?

He shook his head to clear the voice. But it seemed to reverberate throughout the room. The scene froze and became grayed, black and white. Johnny could move, though. A chill ran down his spine.

A shadow appeared in front of him. It became solid and he recognized it as…

"Senor Diablo?"

It grinned. "Yes, Johnny. And I wanted to see how you'd fare against such a creature. Of course, she's not real. Just your own fantasies reflected onto a 'canvas'. But isn't she _lovely_?" Diablo grinned, inspecting the girl, who was frozen in a smile, counting change.

Before he knew what he was doing, Johnny had gotten up and began threatening the Devil.

"She's not just something you can toy with! Stop being so self-indulgent and leave her alone!" he yelled.

"Yes, kill me to avoid coming to grips with it. She isn't real, Johnny. But she can _seem_ real. She can exist in this world as solid and caring as any other human-stink-beast. Do you _want_ her to stay here?" The devil bent over, close to Nny's face.

Nny looked towards the frozen girl.

Senor Diablo glided over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders, having to stoop a bit to accommodate his height.

"She's the perfect addition to your diseased reality that can give you some glimmer of hope. After all, God created this world for you to enjoy, didn't he? Bit of a paradox when someone is miserable in it with no hope of recovery.

"I've been thinking, Nny. You need a companion in your loneliness. I've realized you're a bit of a whiner, and so choose to remedy this by giving you a sort of Pandora's Box scenario.

"You have her in your grasp. But will you take her? What could happen if you do? Doesn't it just make you tremble with excitement? And I mean that in the purest way possible, for the perverts listening in."

Nny had been listening, and now tore himself away from absorbing the deep, melancholy voice seeping into him to have his say.

"_NO_ I don't want her! You think you can just play with people however you _like_?! By giving them anything and everything their hearts desire?! I don't want her! She's not real!"

"But she CAN be! I can make her so, Nny. It's not a question of morals. Don't think of her as human. Think of her as…a dream."

That stopped him. A dream? He could imagine it…the perfect person…

Something inside him was urging him to say yes and embrace her like a small child. But a small bit of him was demanding that he walk away; it wasn't right to live in a dream.

He came back to earth when he realized he had thrown himself onto the ground in a fetal position crying out "Nyes! NO-es! Yyyennooo!!!"

Senor Diablo was taken aback. Surely he wasn't _rejecting_ this gift…

Nny composed himself and, standing with tear streaks on his face, covered in grime, stood still with his head half-bowed and convicting eyes blazing beneath the cover of messy hair.

"You couldn't _force_ me to accept a dream. I don't want her. Go back to hell and stay there! I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE NIGHTMARES YOU CALL DREAMS!!!"

With a wisp of smoke, the imposing figure was gone. And with him, the girl who had stood behind the counter. The scene started up again. But Nny had not stayed to watch it. He was on his way home.

To stare into his empty fireplace.


End file.
